I know many are well aware of the popular show of waking dead. Zombies looking to make more zombies in a type of post apocalyptic era.
Did you know that there are many of us walking dead? Yep. Not zombies, although I often feel like that before coffee. Nope walking dead are those of us traveling this life alone. We’re surrounded by family, friends, acquaintances, etc but like a glass child we aren’t seen. Glass children grow up going through the motions but until they majorly fuck up, they aren’t seen. I was the perfect child.. on paper. Honor student, never in trouble, but with friends at concerts went to after parties with hard rocking well known bands, drank myself sober to drive my brother and his friends home.. my parents had no clue. I spent my life trying to be the perfect person, make my parents notice and approve.. take care of everyone. Even as an adult with children, I did the same. So why am I the walking dead? If I had a pat answer I’d tell you.. but I don’t. I have excuses. Never hear from kids I worked to support, grandchildren that I sheltered, friends who don’t think in some of their language they use in describing me..I don’t exist. I’m alive so my Dr’s say, but I’m not living. So technically that makes me one of the walking dead right? So I make excuses for others… they’re busy with their own lives, they didn’t mean to say it that way… endless list.
Contrary to popular show theories, zombies do have brains.. otherwise they couldn’t decide ways to attack others. I have a brain, so then why do I allow myself to accept this kind of treatment? Conditioning. We all succumb to that growing up. We do what it takes to escape as unscathed as we can. This colors our whole outlook on things and how we interact with others. Therefore becoming the walking dead.
If yall want a solution on fixing this type of life, don’t look this way. I have no answers for you. Maybe I’ll ask the therapist next month lol. She’s already added another half hour to my sessions. Probably means I’m pretty fucked up lol.
Deuces