So yeah. This has been long week, and will be longer still since I work for a bit tomorrow. To top it off I am moving. Not that I want to, but the trailer park that I’ve lived in for over 12 years is being sold. All of my little people have lived here, family has been in and out, and now I have to start over. It’s not like I am moving way far away..just an hr down the road, longer drive for work//minor inconveniences. One would think at this point in my life that starting over would not be so scary, but it is. I am sorting through things, trashing some, storing others and taking a little with me. Why not just do a sort and move it all? Well I might have considered that if I wasn’t moving in with my daughter and her husband until I decide what I want to do next. So it truly wont be my home, or even feel like it. I guess that is what has me in a meltdown kind of mood atm. I think I’m took old for all this stress shit. It’s shown up in the cold sores on my lips, the chest pain that has been relieved by the nitro..but short of knocking myself out, I can’t staunch the flow of tears. As I have gone through things, I find things that belonged to my parents that I had sitting out as a remembrance…they go to storage. My son’s belongings are here until he is able to come and retrieve them. Also storage. My corner..the one with altar, herbs, etc…majority of it will go to storage as well with just a traveling altar that I usually carry on trips will go with me. That makes me sad because most of what makes me feel comfortable will not be around me. It may be temporary thing, but it sure feels like a knife between the shoulder blades. But as I continue to sort, I have also let go of things that no longer function for me either in the mundane or pathwise. A friend on FB has a blog/newsletter that he emails out and this week’s was about letting go of “stuff”. Since the move this weekend wasn’t unexpected, it hit right on time. So I began a purge. Finding shineys that I thought I HAD to have in the beginning of this walk, books that I havent read in a long time, and probably will never open again, so they will be passed along. Herbs that were forgotten and are beyond a time that I use them will be burned later on this weekend. My own personal ritual of sorts in letting go. It’s all been a little overwhelming. Ya’ll remember I have control issues, so yeah…its freaking me the fuck out. But I’ll live, let go of things and move on to another chapter, whatever that brings. So looking at brighter side of things..here is to new beginnings…SLAINTE’
3 thoughts on “Moving and memories”
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This is happening to me only in reverse. My daughter and grandson are moving in with me. While I am thrilled to have them back in this State, I like you, have those control issues.
It will be a trying time for both myself and my daughter. She will be feeling the same as you are, comforting things in storage, minimal things brought into my home.
I am also having to “purge” somethings as well to make room for them. I don’t let go of things easily. I have one whole room that is “mine”. All of those who have passed on, I keep their things in there. It is also my file room. My DVD room (all 300+ in alphabetical order). Just MY room of MY stuff. I have to find room to at least put a single bed.
It will certainly be hard on the both of us. I will certainly be keeping you in my prayers. At our age major change is not good! I love you, my friend.
I love you too G, and we’ll get through it I’m sure. The change is what bothers me most..OCD people..yeah, we don’t do well with that,lol. I just needed to put it out there to straighten out the lines as it were so I can move on.